nvme/nda: Fail all nvme I/Os after controller fails

Once the controller has failed, fail all I/O w/o sending it to the
device. The reset of the nvme driver won't schedule any I/O to the
failed device, and the controller is in an indeterminate state and can't
accept I/O. Fail both at the top end of the sim and the bottom
end. Don't bother queueing up the I/O for failure in a different task.

Reviewed by: chuck
Sponsored by: Netflix
Differential Revision: https://reviews.freebsd.org/D31341

(cherry picked from commit 4b977e6dda92fe093ea300f1a91dbcf877b64fa0)